Surviving divorce and starting a new life is a great challenge for anyone.
Depending on who gains custody of the children, it is that person who suffers the most from the effects of separation. The children remain in their custody. They work for the family’s daily expenses while trying to be the mother and/or the father of their children. Not to mention, the emotional impact he/she is still struggling with. It is not surprising that a divorced person is advised to seek guidance in terms of training or having a support network.
Surviving divorce after 60 is a different ball game entirely. At this point, most people think that it will be impossible to move on given the advancement in age. However, it is very possible to survive divorce at 60. Starting over after divorce at 60 involves a lot of self-love and putting the following advice into action:
1. Get support
Usually, the news of the divorce comes with a blow and the events are so fast that everyone in the family is starting a new life. But there are still cases in which the person is aware of an impending divorce. This makes sense if you have discovered that your husband/wife is cheating on you or that your relationship is falling apart. Whether unexpected or not, the separation process will not be easy, particularly emotionally.
For the most part, you should seek a support network to help you cope with the emotional impact of separation. This support network is commonly made up of your friends, family , and church. Many times, it is advisable to leave your comfort zone to look for other means, such as an online divorce forum or a divorce coach who has gone through the painful process of divorce.
2. Be strong
Starting over after the divorce at 60 is going to be difficult, but you must be strong. If you have found a reliable support network, make the most of the opportunities you can get from it, including the development of your emotional strength.
You know you have to be strong, yes, it’s easier said than done. But being strong is your only option, not only for yourself but also for your children. At 60, there is a high possibility that you are already retired. Therefore, to help you stay strong, you should become actively involved in activities that you love. You can go to the movies for a relaxing weekend or enjoy the wonders of being in a spa.
3. Renew life
A visible effect of separation is the fact that nothing will ever be the same. Relive your life on your own terms. Your plans shared with your former spouse will be useless. It is not practical for you to continue imagining living with your separated husband. You have to start renewing your life in which your focus should be your children and yourself.
If your children are all adults with families of their own, then you can be more flexible with your time and restrategize based on your own rules.
4. Seek help
It is not a bad idea to seek counseling from experts through a one-on-one coaching session. This will help and guide you which are starting over at the age of 60 after divorce while dealing with the effects of divorce. You may need professional help in addition to your support network. If that is what you are feeling, then go ahead. You need all the guidance you can have in these difficult times. Consulting with divorce professionals can be beneficial for you.
5. Think well on the past to eliminate potential regret
Be sure to take the time to reflect on the past and remember the reasons that led you to this state of mind. One thing that you should absolutely avoid is going through a divorce and feeling so much regret because of the decision.
Think deeply about your reasons for divorce and confirm once again that divorce is the best course of action. This will help eliminate anxiety and regret can be an essential factor in determining your likelihood of surviving divorce after 60.
6. Admit to yourself that, no matter how your situation got to this breaking point of wanting a divorce, you had a hand in it and plan to improve.
Even if you know that your current spouse is not a good option for you, be smart enough to know that you should not waste the opportunity you have at this time to improve, for your own good after you have moved on. At a time like this, when emotions are running out, there tends to be a lot of soul-searching, and that’s a good thing if you want to make sure you have a solid chance of surviving divorce after 60. Realise that you need to improve yourself, this will only help you in the future.
7. Remember that your happiness and your plan to survive the divorce must include evaluating and establishing a certain level of self-confidence.
Having confidence in yourself is absolutely critical to starting over after divorce at 60 because without it, fear will generally triumph, and your situation will not improve. Even if you divorce but do not evaluate your own level of self-confidence in the hope of improving it, you may find yourself in a difficult time after the divorce. If you want a sure way to feel good about surviving the divorce, do yourself a favour and work on your self-confidence.
Because you are 60 doesn’t mean that you are excluded from the dating world. Go out feeling good about your appearance, use a scent that you absolutely love and always go out looking beautiful. Making your appearance as amazing as you would want boosts your self-confidence and helps you not to keep thinking of your past.
8. Evaluate your finances and understand that your life will change drastically from a monetary point of view.
This is an integral part of the surviving divorce equation, especially for anyone that is divorced. Many times, people in divorce situations have to deal with financial problems and fear of living alone because they have had financial support before. Even so, this concept resonates greatly with a person over 60 as their lives will change financially as a result of divorce, that’s a guarantee.
To ensure that your chances of starting over at 60 after divorce are high, you must be willing to plan accurately for potential financial losses due to the divorce.
9. Understand the actual value of using “projection” to guarantee surviving divorce.
This is an excellent exercise when facing a divorce decision, and you want to make sure you have a great chance of surviving divorce after 60. “Projection” simply means looking into the future and imagining what your life will be like once you have divorced.
If you try, you’ll see multiple scenarios of what your life will be after the divorce, and you can determine what factors lead to each of those scenarios. Then, choose the situation in which you would like to live and take the necessary steps to implement those factors. This is one of the most essential practices to ensure that your chances of surviving divorce after 60 are high.
Starting a new life and surviving divorce is a struggle for most people. Remember the tips and suggestions mentioned here to help you get back on your feet. Never let divorce end your life no matter your age. You can end your marriage, but it should not end with you as a person.