September is a time of change for so many households. It’s that time of year when the leaves are beginning to change colour, the temperature has dropped a little. It’s a new term. Some are excited, others fearful of new beginnings.
We may not all be about to become empty nesters, or have sent our children or grandchildren off to school for the first time or jollied them in to returning for the next year. But we all have memories of summer holidays coming to an end and school starting. It does not matter how old we are or how hidden we like to think it is, that back-to-school feeling is there inside of us. Depending on our school experience, for some it is a positive feeling and for others not.
How does this play out for us now as we go about our adult life?
For many people it’s a time when they are thinking of change. A new job, new career, and new relationship. Moving away from the same old, same old routines. Some will sign up for evening classes, start new projects, sign up for online dating or decide on to move home. Others decided to take up a new sport or just get fitter and healthier.
Before taking the first steps, take the time to check in with yourself:
How much do you really want to?
Are you reacting to other people’s wants and desires?
How do you want to feel?
Who do you want to be?
How does this fit in to your life?
How will you set time in your diary for this?
Just how committed are you to be consistent and persistent to be successful?
You might think this is a long way from learning Spanish at an evening class. But if you have not got a clear idea of the why and how much you want to achieve the outcome, when the going gets tough and you don’t do the homework for a couple of weeks, you’re likely to drop out.
Unlike school, you have that option. But if you know that you’re learning Spanish because you’re planning on going on holiday there next summer, you’ll be more committed to making the time to do the homework and practice. As your Spanish improves you’ll be pleased with yourself, feel good and be more positive.
So just take a moment to answer the questions above. You do not need to share your answers with anyone but yourself.
Taking the plunge
Once you’ve done this, if all is good, go ahead and take the steps to do something different and make a change. If it is what you really want to do.
Issac Newton is quoted as saying “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results.” Certainly if when we are feeling stuck and lacking purpose it is time to stop doing the same thing.
So often rather than really do something different, making a real change, we tend to stay in our comfort zone, just perhaps making a tweak or two. Or we dare to go bigger, looking at new jobs, but choose something similar and find we are really in the same situation just a slightly different environment. Then wonder why, after a short time, we are back feeling unfulfilled.
It is not always easy to take the time to really check in with ourselves, it can seem to be self indulgent, time consuming or just odd.
But it can save you time, money and negative feelings
Time – rather than wasting time doing something that doesn’t really interest us, we invest our time in choices that led to a more fulfilling exciting life.
Money – instead of expenses such as joining a gym we don’t go to or enrolling on a course we don’t complete we invest in ourselves to be brighter, have amazing experiences and live a full life.
Feelings – when we are positive about the choices we make, we enjoy the adventures and are striving for our desires. We feel in control and good about ourselves.